How I met my true love…

He was my first love, I knew it the moment I set my eyes on him. He was on a date with someone else – a beautiful brunette with big brown eyes and long lashes but that’s all I noticed about her but him…?It wasn’t that he was captivating, he is not handsome by magazine standards. He did not have the physique to make you drool either but there was that one thing that made my heart dance ballet.

It all began the moment he smiled – his eyes lit up as bright as the stars, time froze and it was the very first time the world faded away and I was captivated by this one person in my line of sight. He had the most beautiful smile that electrified me. It was that very moment that I knew that I would lose all my senses and self preservation so that he would smile at me. But then he wasn’t smiling at me – he was smiling with me.

When he smiled my heart smiled too, I wanted to capture that moment and freeze it for eternity, I wanted to safe-keep it for tomorrow, for eternity, for forever and for when times were not pleasant. I wanted to write a poem about that smile and about how I felt and fold it in an album of memories. Unfortunately  I  was so captivated I left that spot without a name or a number.  I was not even aware that I met one true love…

I hate to burst your bubble as my true love wasn’t him but at the time I did not realize it. As fate would have it I bumped into the guy whose smile melted my resolve as well as my heart – I learned that his name is William, a name associated with greatness and great he was to me. He asked me out for coffee and coffee turned into dinner and dinner into spending twenty hours of the day together. What happened to the brunette? I have no idea and I didn’t even learn her name. Cruel right?No, its called love. When the heart is involved it is difficult for anything else to object, even the universe. At least  that’s what happens to me.

William was everything that every fairy-tale infatuated lady dreams about. He was intelligent – very intelligent. He bought roses, he remembered birthdays, anniversaries and he was poetic too. Charm was his middle name, he was perfect – almost but he had one flaw, insecurity. That is the reason he is in past tense. One day insecurity blinded him and he could neither see me nor the love we had for each anymore but only himself . In life sometimes our flaws blind us. Such blindness happens to the best of us…

One day we argued about what I can’t recall and then he turned his back, walked out the door. The last memory I have of him  is his receding back into oblivion. He did not even look back, not even once and he was gone. I waited for that text message that always came through saying “I am sorry, forgive me?” but it never came and days turned into months and months into years….

I should have been sad. I should have cried because I loved him. He was my love but…When he walked out that door the truth walked in and I saw it coming. He wasn’t my true love but he was my muse. His very first smile introduced me to my true love, to capture emotions, the need to write. I wanted to write, to praise, to draw and express myself. That is my true love.Every time I write, my heart still skips a beat. Its been so long but the love is deep and it grows everyday.  I am unapologetic and smitten with reading and writing. William did this for me, he introduced me to my one true love and ever since I have never looked back. I keep falling in love over and over…

This is not about how I lost my first love but how I met my true love.

 

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